I was reading where the sailors of old would purchase knotted cords from the village witch that she knotted the wind into because they wanted to insure they would not get stuck on the ocean without the wind to get home.

That's kind of what I am thinking -

by spell work, I'm not talking about putting one on ATC. I'm looking more to enhance my abilities to deal with their extreems. They leave me unbalanced and I think that is something I can change. Obviously I can't quit this job or I would have. With so many yrs under one's belt - the pay is not something you just go out and find again.

I have a Blue Heron feather. It's what I have been so drawn to lately and everyone suggests feathers for the air element so I went looking for the meaning of Heron medicine and found this...

THE HERON

The heron is part of the family of birds known as "waders". They live and feed in marshlands and in shallow waters, and are often confused with cranes and storks. The heron carries a strong message, and it takes a very special person to live with heron medicine.

You are strong and aggressive, determine your own course in life and rely upon yourself. You find a comfortable balance in the "shifting sands" of life for you are able to see opportunity where many would not look twice. You know what is best for you, and have the courage to follow your own path.

You are a person who does not need the security of a 9 to 5 job, pension plan, group insurance and the assurance that every day will be the same. You are one of those rare breeds that can live on the razor's edge of life, and have an in-born instinct about what will and what won't work for you. You are happiest when you are exploring many things, learning many skills, and are often known as a "jack of all trades". While this may give the impression that you are flighty and irresponsible, quite the opposite is true. If one thing fails you, you have an assortment of knowledge and skills to fall back on. You are never without, and adapt into new working situations with ease.

While you enjoy a social life, it is not a necessary part of your existence for you are quite at home alone, with your own thoughts and devices. You are comfortable with yourself, and have no need to be surrounded by people. You are not impressed with status symbols, or accumulating "things", and have no need or desire to play the game of "keeping up with the Joneses".

The great blue heron is the "boss bird", the king of the marshes. It is the tallest of the herons, and the most powerful in flight. It hunts with a slow, deliberate, stalking stride that seems to tell everything else to stand aside. If you are attracted to the blue, you approach new opportunities with even more aggression. You know what is best for you, and will not allow anyone else to change your path.

Heron medicine is strong and courageous. It is not afraid to take responsibility for every aspect of life. It will never pass the buck, or deny an act or deed. It is the totem of character and strong will, but it will never use those gifts to bully or take advantage of others.

Seems rather appropriate... now to figure out how to use the feather in a specific  way. I have been known to wear it in my hair if I need to - there are some other things too using herbs and wind - I'm so earth oriented and this thing is bigger than just one element which is why I think it's important to look at the whole picture.

It may also be time to redo my medicine bag.